4 reasons why religion is the key to a strong marriage

by Nancy Pina

Focusing on what truly matters in a well lived life provides the stability and life satisfaction everyone wants to experience.

As a Christian relationship coach, the foundation of my work is based on faith. Without proper structure, you cannot know what to expect in love, especially in marriage. While on a mental or cultural level it may appear to be financially more feasible to raise a family alone, research shows that traditional models of marriage provide greater personal fulfillment, despite some financial sacrifices. The benefits of social support is extremely conducive for emotional and physical well being.

According to a recent article, people who regularly attend church marry at higher rates,divorce at lower rates, have more children and tend to be more faithful than those who do not. These positive benefits of regular church attendance not only keep couples spiritually, emotionally and physically healthy, but also strengthens intimate relationships. Placing faith as the foundation of marriage is the key to attaining the innate desires, true emotional security and the lasting fulfillment each person is ultimately searching for in life. No one looks back and wonders if they should have worked more for financial security; it is the quality of the relationships that can become a large regret if one does not have proper life priorities.

Many of you have met those who believe that going to church on a weekly basis is optional for the life of a believer; or perhaps that describes where you are today. We are made for community and connection and church attendance is an excellent avenue to build a strong life foundation. I have coached many couples who believe they are closer to God when they are in nature, saying it is just as good as going to church. While it is positive to appreciate creation and the beauty of nature, it is not a substitute and will not create a strong foundation of a shared life. We all need those around us who can hold us accountable to the values and morals we profess to believe. Left alone, it is human nature to stray from what one knows is right.

God's true character is revealed. For believers, God is the source in all areas, especially financially. Developing faith comes from learning how God works in and through individual lives and in a couple's shared vision. Attending church provides the atmosphere of love and it is through that most important relationship that one has with God that marital love can flourish. Most people identify the character traits of their biological fathers and project those traits on God. If your father was harsh and unloving, distant and judgmental, you probably have an inclination towards believing God is the same in His character. Developing your faith reveals the true identity of your God. Churches have the motivation and resources to help you on that journey. This is an important step in marriage because the tendency to repeat the pattern that was modeled in childhood is the norm until one learns that there is an alternative.

You meet like-minded couples. If you go to church with the mindset that you will make good connections with people who are kind, loving and caring, you will bring that experience into your life, just as much as having the opposite attitude will lead to that corresponding result. Developing good friendships also keeps couples accountable to each other.

Empathy during a crisis. Job loss is an extremely challenging event in a marriage and can be even more painful experience when there is no one to share those fears with. People who are hurting or have walked through similar circumstances will be at church. Couples can find a group of people they can share heartbreak, suffering and struggles with those who have been there. Do not dismiss the healing power of a few encouraging words from those who know exactly what you and your spouse are going through.

Corporate worship provides focus. Singing praises to God is a reminder of where our priorities need to be in life. Giving God the glory and honor through worship takes the spotlight off one's challenges and obstacles and reminds us that nothing is too insurmountable for God. The monetary gain one has presently is not a guarantee of forever prosperity. Focusing on what truly matters in a well lived life provides the stability and life satisfaction everyone wants to experience.

Couples who make a commitment to find a place of worship with the mindset that the benefits of emotional and spiritual fulfillment are more valuable than the possible financial shortfalls some associate with marriage, the more likely the benefits of fellowship will outweigh going it alone.

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